Ever wondered why a business or personal relationship fails? Most people never do, deeming it just too painful or complicated to try. Well, I have wondered most of my life and come up with the simplest and most obvious answer—death by a thousand cuts.
In other words, simply too many nasty and unresolved disputes. Obvious, right? Now, who is going to argue with me about that, eh?
If this is true, then shouldn’t we go through hell and high water to resolve all of our disagreements that have devolved into disputes and conflicts? I say yes. So, whoever comes up with the most straightforward and effective process for resolving disputes will be onto a winner. Well, I think I have come up with such a procedure, and now I am just waiting for the rest of the world to realize this most evident and simple thought.
The process is based around these principles:
- All disagreements are thoughtful until they devolve into a dispute as one or more participants play the man and not the ball. It becomes personal.
- We agree or disagree with the content of the discussion but object to the misbehavior in real-time when someone plays the man.
- When we object, we do it in 3 phases or steps, escalating the objection from a Caution, to an official Objection, to a Stop, with a different level of response to each objection stage.
- At the third level of objection, the dispute is posted on the dispute network and reviewed by our peers. If necessary, a vote is taken and a recommendation made.
And that is it. If anyone has any questions, please ask me so that I can simplify this explanation even more.