Victim Blaming

When it comes to the abuse of a victim, the politically correct squad has set up what seems to me to be a barrier or no-touch zone for looking at the victim’s role in the abuse. I know this is very controversial, but I am willing to broach this subject here, at the risk of becoming a victim myself…ha!

So, we have the abuser and the abused and a framework that allows this behavior to exist. Let’s identify all three components here.

The Abuser

The abuser is offensive in their behavior, which usually has a measure of anger attached to it and results in the following misbehaviors:

The behavior of the abuser usually stems from anger and results in the above misbehaviors.

The Abused

The abused person is usually submissive in their behavior, stemming from many well worn sayings that seem to be designed to keep the abused from speaking up to stop abusive behavior.

Submissive behavior encouraged by these cliches.

The framework

Putting it all together with implicit intimidation and implicit submission, and we have what seems to be an ideal co-dependent framework that sustains the misbehavior of the abuser and the submissiveness of the abused. That does not mean we are only one or the other. We can go from one to the other on different occasions during the day. For example, I might come from a framework that allows my boss to abuse me and then go home to a similar framework that allows me to abuse my wife or kids.

The goal here is to change these behaviors by adapting a new framework designed for us to object to misbehavior as it occurs. Object123 is our proposed FRAMEWORK we use to object to misbehavior that leads to abusive and submissive behavior.

What is Object123?

This is power abuse although many offenders would disagree.

Object123 is a simple Social Just Culture tool that we have developed to help stop power abuse in the workplace. We see this as a very important part of workplace health and safety, that is, a Psychological Safety using a Just Culture process. And as Just Culture encourages teams to own up to mistakes by not blaming or punishing them, a Social Just Culture encourages teams to expose and confront misbehavior, in real-time rather than repress it and backbite the offender.

Organization members are encouraged to openly disagree and simultaneously OBJECT to, and acknowledge any poor behavior during the three phase process. Thereby, nipping at the bud, any disputes before they become heated conflicts and saving countless lost hours of gossiping, backbiting, strained office politics and abuses of power.


disagreeing Vs objecting

Firstly it consists of us agreeing to observe and separate our disagreements into two parts.
1. Our content of the disagreement
2. Our behavior while delivering the content
We disagree with the content as per usual but OBJECT to our behavior, in real-time. during our discussion.

During a disagreement we disagree with the content
but object to the behavior or delivery of the content


three phases of objection

Object123 consists of three phases of objection, small, medium and large. Each phase requires an acknowledgement from the offender or they can try justify their offensive behavior. The three phases are:
1. Caution – Receive a simple acknowledgement or escalate to…
2. Objection – Receive a simple apology or escalate to…
3. Stop – Receive an acceptable apology or escalate to…

The 3 phases of Objection

final democratic process

It also includes a final democratic process to ultimately eliminate any unresolved disputes, where the offender and offended attends the Friday afternoon weekly meeting and their case is adjudicated by a team of their peers (not HR or management). Without an acceptable explanation or acceptable apology the offender will most likely be let go, regardless if they are the manager or even the CEO. We want to shift power from the top and give everyone, from the janitor to the CEO, access to social justice.

A team of our peers decide the outcome of our unresolved dispute
Social Justice the Object123 Way